Feeling the warmth of the sun on a cloudy day. A glimpse into a blind billy goat's unique, ever changing perspectives.

2017 06 05 Journal Excerpt: Page 19 June 5, 2017

As I read through my journal, I have a hard time some days trying to figure out where to cut off for the next segment. The information tends to come across as a bunch of short scenes, which is exactly the way things transpired back then, and now as well. Life is full of little segments that make up a day, then a week, then a month, then before you know it, you’re a year older. Sometimes those little blurbs of life take forever to happen, and sometimes they roar through in the blink of an eye.

This is page 19 of the journey, and I hope your journey through today is a good one.



Page 19

I did manage to get my wife’s laptop running with the help of Lynne and Steve. He had helped her get System Access going on it and I was able to figure out how to run it for the most part. It sure was good to have it with me as I went back to the center. I felt connected with everyone through email. The first two weeks left me frustrated trying to use the community pc at the center. I was unfamiliar with Jaws, and they were running windows millennium, a platform that I was very unfamiliar with. I did manage to get out a few facebook posts those first few weeks, but the experience was lame at best. I was very frustrated and welcomed the switch to my own laptop.

The first weekend home did seem to fly by and before I knew it, I was back at the center raring to dive head first into my six week program. I also managed to get skype going on the laptop, and after I got my folks and my sister Terri on it also, it felt like I had a slice of home right there with me in my room.

Carlos did graduate and I was wondering if there was going to be another roommate to keep me up at nights. There was none. I had the room all to myself. I also had the bathroom all to me as the other two people who shared the facilities with us were also not there any more. I had the next 3 weeks to myself. I slept very well the next few nights and really enjoyed the peace and quiet in the room. Carlos used to talk non stop about things that I couldn’t even understand. His heavy Hispanic accent left me pretending that I knew what he was talking about.

In those first few days of my full program, I got into a routine that was both comfortable and relaxing to me. I started walking around the campus in the evenings and early on the weekend mornings. I would walk roughly an hour at a time, and it felt good. I also did get some recognition from a lot of the clients as well as a few of the instructors. I found myself counting the minutes at the end of the day until I could go on my walk. I had a good route set up, and I could see enough of the contrasted visuals so that after a couple days, I could almost make it around the entire half mile route without using my cane. I felt like I was cheating, but I felt damn normal walking without the cane. It just felt like I had full control of the situation. One thing I had lost sight of was control of certain situations that included my mobility. After all of those hard lessons with Heather, it felt so wonderful to be able to walk around without any assistance. I felt independent, just like Hermie the dentist.

I guess that as my program progressed, I built a good relationship with all of the instructors as well as the clients. I was there for myself, and everyone knew that. I was also there to gain friendships and connections that might someday benefit me in my future situations and ordeals.

I did keep in touch with Leona from DBVI with emails. I got to talk to my wife every night on skype, as well as my folks and Matt also. One night I remember in particular, I was chatting with Lynne on Skype and she was playing me music she was finding online back at home. It was like I had my own personal DJ doing a radio show tailored especially for me. It was an evening spent with my wife I will never forget. It was wonderful to say the least. We did it again for another couple of nights, but none of them were as good as that first night. My DJ Cubby. I smile now thinking of it.

Well the weeks passed by and I was afforded another weekend back home. Matt was coming to get me and take me back for the weekend. He put a ton of miles on his car in those 2 months. He told me that he was able to find the center without any directions after a couple times back and forth. He felt like a world traveler. I think he liked the traveling. I know that I used to love coming down around the Boston area. It just felt so alive compared to the slow pace back at home. He agreed.

To be continued…


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