All of the Brilliance from All of the Stars
Part of me feels like its missing. Part of me seems to be misplaced. I know why, but, well, I just don’t know why. Once in a while, I sense that something amazing is coming at me, and for a few seconds I’m overwhelmed by a deep, pulsating surge of energy that causes me to take a deep breath.
I think I know what it is. As a matter of fact, I’m fairly positive I know what it is. It’s strength, courage, kindness, patience, disciplined guidance, unmatched affection and never ending love. It’s a comforting word during a difficult time, an arms folded shit eating grin, a pat on the back followed by a kick in the butt. It’s all the brilliance from all the stars in the universe wrapped in a hug. It’s what I know, what I admire, what I look up to and crave and yearn for and desire. It’s a lasting memory, filled with holiday bows and baseball gloves. It’s a sense of feeling, unmatched by anything under the warming sun. It’s a pick up truck parked under a maple tree.
With so many thoughts and snap shots spinning ‘round my mind, they all reflect back to the images of my past. They all gently remind me of a towering, powerful figure that represented absolute security. They tell a story not unlike so many others, but uniquely my own.
They write in the sky with script from above, and for this, I am blessed.
What I miss, what I lean into, what I listen for are those same strong tones, that same rolling laugh, that comforting voice ringing through our home that used to put me to sleep so many nights.
I am a grateful man, a grateful child, a grateful son.
I miss you Dad, and I thank you.