Surviving

Feeling the warmth of the sun on a cloudy day. A glimpse into a blind billy goat's unique, ever changing perspectives.

2011 05 14 Family Influence May 14, 2011

05 14 2011
I absolutely love my family. I wouldn’t trade any of them for any amount of money on the planet. There just couldn’t be another group of individuals who were more perfectly suited for me and my personality than the family I already have.
From the earliest memories I can recall, I have felt so safe , secure and at home with these wonderful people. I am not talking just of my immediate family, although there is none better, but of all my aunts and uncles and cousins and nieces and nephews and on and on. It seems that God put us all together to make one complete package.
I never felt safer than when I was with my parents and siblings. We were the clan that could never be derailed, no matter what the conditions. My parents were the foundation that all else grew upon and developed through the years. I have no better, warmer feelings than when I think back when I was a child with my family. So many memories that surround my past were blanketed by the pride and passion that our parents exuded onto ourselves as kids.
I tried to pass this incredible feeling of security onto my son. I suppose that most of the traits that I showed to him were those that were handed down to me by my mom and dad. Although my wife and I only had one child. We couldn’t have been more blessed with what we had. We were, as my childhood was, a complete package that I hope my son felt comfortable with.
I know it must have been a lot different for him growing up as an only child, but he was loved none the less, and all the more. I can still hear the excitement in my wife’s voice when she is talking about, or talking to him. He will always be our little bundle of joy.
As I have grown up and turned into a gray haired billy goat I feel as though I am as close, if not closer to my family than I have ever been. Not only because of this past years turn of events, but because I realize more than ever their importance in my own existence. They are the reason that I am who I am. No other person or thing has had the influence on me than they have. When I think of them I often am reduced to a teary eyed teddy bear with emotion oozing out of every pore that I have
I was not always like this. I often did think of them, but I never really got emotional while doing so. I don’t know if everyone goes through this, but I wouldn’t exchange the feelings for anything. It is pure emotion and it feels good to be able to have as much passion for my family as I do.
It is wonderful to hear the pure excitement in my wife’s voice when she is interacting with our grandson. It makes me think back to the look on my own grandparents faces while we use to visit them in the summers downeast. Those were great summers. Perfect in every way, and it was all made possible with love of family. That’s all you need really.
That’s the whole package. That’s what every soul should strive for. That’s the gas in my engine. The hop in my step. The sparkle in my eye. I don’t know how I could ever go on with out the thought of family not being there, either in flesh. Or memory.
The overwhelming feeling of being part of something so wonderful and precious and sacred and secure, well let me tell you, there is nothing better under the sun.
These wonders of the human heart will be passed down through the ages for ages to come. They will be done. The love will continue, as it always has, as it always will. There’s nothing that can be done to stop it, thank god.
I mean really, who would want to?
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